This might turn into an overwhelmingly long post. Enjoy or keep on scrolling. 🙂
It started with a small, digital, compact camera and I began to increase the number of pictures that I took. I began to take pictures daily, of everything all the time, and I dove into the world of editing, which I had refused up until that point. In my mind, it had been something dishonest but when I started to take more digital than analog pictures I realized that the digital pictures did not communicate the mood, the way I saw things, which I then learned that I could add through editing. When I had taken analog pictures this was already given to me by the choice of camera and film.
Suddenly I had heaps and heaps of pictures I did not know what to do with. I had heaps of everything. Because it was the same with notes I wrote down in endless documents, reflections and stories, and the recipes I made up. I also had pictures of the process and result of things I made such as paintings, drawings, clay and other objects. I had pictures of our daily life together, beautiful details that I did not want to be missed or forgotten, and of the special trips we did to new places and places we adored and returned to. All these stories and memories needed a home, somewhere where I could collect them, tell them, go back to remind myself of them. I had to make them a home. I needed a blog.
Since then the process of having a blog teaches me how to tell better, more accurate stories both in pictures and in words. It teaches me what makes a good picture for the specific purpose that I am taking it and what other pictures are needed in order to tell the story. It makes me find the theme I did not realize I had. Then I can see what words I need to accompany the pictures to explain or add meaning. If it is a story told only in words I write and rewrite many times to reach the point where I feel that the text has arrived at the content and meaning it was meant to have, which at first was only a feeling or a beginning of a thought I had.
Then, we got a new digital, compact camera. I cried happy tears. It is a beautiful, beautiful camera that is stripped down, peeled back, and minimalistic in its execution. As it is small I bring it with me everywhere I go and I can bring it up without anyone noticing. It allows me to increase the number of pictures I take/make and by that, it teaches me quality too. One step at a time it grows. Increment by increment it moves ahead.
In August 2019 I posted two times a week. In March 2020 I added one more day to the schedule. In April 2021 I decided to “Open up Mondays” as I called it and I knew that the decision would make me create more. I knew it would be a challenge to post four times a week and I wanted that challenge. I was curious to see what I would make of it. In the spreadsheet that I have, with every post that I have posted and am going to post, I see the red marked days, which is the color I have chosen to show what slots I still have to fill. When I scroll through the red marked weeks to come it makes me think “What is next?”.
I think it is sharing my writing. I think it needs to be that, that I need it, to keep my mind in that realm more often. I think it does me good, to let the overflow flow freely. This far I have been questioning how personal I can be without being more private than I want to be, and my writing is mostly very private but I also know that this is my best writing. Likewise, I have a huge drive to express myself, to make things from physical objects to a passage of text, and I want to share what I make. I have questioned the sharing part so much lately, and I go back and forth between being very excited about sharing, reaching someone else, to somehow connect with another person through what I made, and then I just want to hide and never share anything ever again. 🙂
Taking/making pictures will not stop. I continuously and constantly take/make pictures, documenting what I do and make, and making small photoshoots at home by myself and with my friends. I have questioned if I love too many different mediums of expression but then found it OK because that is who I am. I love many different things, I have phases of diving into them. Deal with it, I tell myself.
This made me see that pictures are something that I no longer give up for even a day and I take different kinds of pictures. Sometimes the picture is only the picture, like a picture of a landscape that you consider to print and frame and would not mind seeing every day. Other times, the picture is documentation, the light might be awful and the crop weird but it shows that day in the workshop where the piece came together.
Then I want to give focus to develop skills to grow my competence in expressing my design ideas such as sketching and CAD (Computer-Aided Design). Within a year I have finished my third year of Industrial Design and I need to have reached a certain level of competence and have confidence in these two methods.
Learning and making take time and effort. I must choose consciously what I put my hours into. I am curious to find out how I manage this, how I prioritize to fulfill these desires of mine, and how I will change with it.